Things That Make You Go Hmmm...

New Digs

I moved into my spacious 200-300 sq ft studio last Tuesday. And I must say I’ve done wonders with the place. My kitchen consists of a small fridge/freezer and a table that holds my toaster oven/stove combo, French press, electric kettle and it also serves as a food prep area and dish washing station. Over my bed hangs my monstrosity of a mosquito net (frog green in color). I’ve already put up photos and magnets on my fridge and nightstand, taped up postcards from my adoring HoMH and hung up my Betty White calendar. My place only looks disheveled due to the lack of a wardrobe to place my clothes.

Also, for those of you worried about my safety (you know who you are), the welder came by and installed a burglar door and bars on the window. It’s pretty common to take these security precautions. I have been running to keep myself busy and relieve stress. PC says that being visible within your community is one of the best ways to stay safe. The theory is that once people know who you are they will have a greater investment in looking out for you.

The name of my village means: looking for each other. I have seen three areas of my village, but I suspect it is much larger. It is very different from the one I lived in for training. In my area there are no shebeens, livestock, homes with tin roofs or pit latrines, most people have cars and the dogs are domesticated. I have also discovered that there are black Afrikaner people living here. The village is now predominately black, but I know it wasn’t always that way. The high school is located several miles away on the other side of the highway. RDP houses (government projects) are found on that side with a mix of nicer homes. There is another cluster of RDP homes about a half mile behind where I live. My landlord took me to visit some of the people she used to prepare meals for and the conditions they are living in are deplorable. People are given housing, but there is no holistic approach to identifying their other needs (e.g. food, health care). Today I am going to the municipality to find out if I can go through town records or any other data sources to learn more about the village.

“Town” is two intersecting streets with:
-four bodega type markets
-gas station
-a hardware store
-post office
-taxi rank
-PEP Store (a chain that mainly sells clothes, air time, housewares)
-police station
-municipality office
-library (It has decent collection, a computer lab and it even has a book detector to prevent theft!)
-butcher (I can buy a chicken and have it personally dissected. Talk about farm fresh organic.)
-gas station
-small produce stands
*I may have missed a couple of stores, but I think my list is fairly exhaustive. In comparison to the descriptions of other PC Volunteers’ sites, mine is almost a bustling city.

My village feels a little more like a suburb, however when you drive out of town there is only land for miles upon miles. I am living in the back house of my landlord’s property. It’s a concrete structure with a tin roof. She also rents out five other rooms. In total I think there are 10 of us. Most of the women are students at the local nursing school. Even if I don’t interact with them very much, it’s nice to hear the hustle and bustle of other people and not feel so alone. We all share the bathroom and I was pleasantly surprised to find out that I do not have use a pit latrine anymore! The bathroom has a flush toilet, sink and cold water shower (so I’ve been sticking with bucket baths.)

Flashback

Toward the end of training, we had a class discussion on child rearing. I told Jan that from my observations childhood in South Africa ends at a young age. I haven’t quite identified what age this is, but it is definitely before age 10. Babies are very coddled, but once children are old enough they start pitching in to help with chores (e.g. fetching water, caring for siblings, cleaning the house). It seems to be the reverse from American culture where children are often put above all and parents sometimes go without to make sure their children have what they value to be essentials. I shared with Jan the parable of a grandfather and his grandchild:

A grandfather tells the child to jump and promises to catch him/her. In one version of the story the grandfather doesn’t catch the child in order to illustrate that in life you cannot rely on anyone. In the other version, the grandfather catches the child and says that he will always be there for him/her.

I told Jan I thought the former story seems to apply to South Africa, while the latter applies to America. This was definitely what PC loves to call a “teaching moment.” As an American, I feel for children here. Their carefree youth seems short-lived and often times they don’t get the same affection and time that we are conditioned to believe are rights. Jan said parents don’t indulge their children because they want to prepare them for the hard times in life when they will have to go without things. For instance, in my former host family the children were always the last to eat in the family. I would serve myself a modest amount, but the largest portion would always go to the oldest brother who was the male head of the household. Sometimes I would see the two younger brothers and one of their friends sharing one plate of food equivalent to my portion. I am still trying to process the idea of when and how it is appropriate to teach children about the harsh realities of life. PC told us there will be times when we experience situations that go against our norms and values and it is not our job to change our minds or challenge others; rather, we must try to understand the mindset behind the perspective, belief or attitude.

Flash Forward

Unfortunately, my transition to site has not been easy. Work has been at a standstill. I attended the monthly community-based organizations (CBO) meeting and I introduced myself, explained my role and offered to assist any of the organizations (mainly spoken in Sepedi!). I gave out my number and hopefully I will receive some calls. In the meantime I am trying to work on my PC Community Needs Assessment and figuring out other ways that I can get involved with the community and/or organizations. It is a difficult task when I only have my landlord to assist me. This week I am planning to attend a CBO training session on Wednesday and a HIV, Tuberculosis, alcohol and drug abuse and teen pregnancy campaign event on Saturday.

PC tried to prepare us for the “slow pace of life,” but perhaps I failed to internalize that lesson. After the long application process and training, you are under the illusion that once you go to site you will start to do things. It is frustrating to know what you have to offer, but not knowing where to start and/or convincing people of your capacity to help.

“The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.”~Nelson Mandela

p.s. For news on SA read: Mail & Guardian http://mg.co.za/
p.p.s. New term that I was introduced to: FOMO—fear of missing out.